求一份《辣妈辣妹》的经典对白

精彩对白 Anna (in Tess's body): I can't marry Ryan. Eww.

Tess (in Anna's body): We'd like to speak to you about something that we think happened to us at your restaurant.

Anna (in Tess's body): Yeah, something that SUCKS.

Pei-Pei's Mom: Coo-kie?

Tess (in Anna's body): I don't believe in physical contact with the opposite sex. At all. Ever. Nothing.

Tess (in Anna's body): I look like Stevie Nicks.

Anna (in Tess's body): Who's he?

Tess (in Anna's body): Role-playing! Her idea. New therapeutic technique. Switching points of view.

Grandpa: If I switch with Harry, do I have to wear a thong?

Harry: [mocking Grandpa] Earthquake. Save me. Earthquake.

Tess (in Anna's body): You pierced your navel?

Anna (in Tess's body): Yeah, I... meant to talk to you about that.

Tess (in Anna's body): When did you do this?

Anna (in Tess's body): At Maddie's cousin's sweet 16.

Tess (in Anna's body): Well, when you get your body back, it's grounded.

Anna (in Tess's body): It's easy to be you. I'll just suck the fun out of everything.

Tess (in Anna's body): I do not suck the fun out of everything.

Anna (in Tess's body): Fun-sucker.

Anna (in Tess's body): Oh, I'm like the Cryptkeeper.

Grandpa: [about Anna] Stop groveling, man. Let her come to YOU.

Ryan: She'd come with a hatchet.

Anna (in Tess's body): Root canal? That's not fair, they're not my teeth.

Anna (in Tess's body): Like cooking: I mean, have you never heard of takeout? And cleaning: let's don't and say we did. Quality time with your kids: You know what? Quit bugging 'em. Leave 'em alone. They like it!

Anna (in Tess's body)</ffb>: Let's just say this cute guy asks you out. What are you gonna do? WOOOH.

Anna (in Tess's body): You mean we're like stuck in this SUCKFEST?

Ryan: OK, where are we going next, Harry's school?

Anna (in Tess's body): Oh, he can walk from here.

Harry: It's 20 blocks!

Anna (in Tess's body): Fresh air will do you good.

Harry: But what about bullies?

Anna (in Tess's body): Run fast.

[as he holds Tess's hand]

Ryan: One more day.

Anna (in Tess's body): Yeah, it's great we're getting married, isn't it? Even though my husband died. How quickly I've been able to get over it.

Mr. Bates: [to a student] Mr. Waters, describe the character of Hamlet.

Mr. Waters: Hamlet. He's, uh... he's one of the big characters. I mean, he's Hamlet. He's just... bopping around... doesn't know which way's up. I don't think the guy's got a clue.

Mr. Bates: You mean to say that he is a man...

Mr. Waters: Yeah.

Mr. Bates: Who couldn't make up his... mind.

Mr. Waters: ...mind. Exactly.

Tess (in Anna's body): Honey. Look, I think something's happened to us.

Anna (in Tess's body): What are you?

Tess (in Anna's body): It's me, Mom.

Anna (in Tess's body): You're not my mother!

Tess (in Anna's body): Yes, I am.

Anna (in Tess's body): Get away, you clone freak!

Tess (in Anna's body): Don't you use that tone with me!

Anna (in Tess's body): Oh my God, you are my mother!

Anna (in Tess's body): Darling. Could you, like, chill for a sec?

Pei-Pei: [about her mother] Oh, she's crazy.

Pei-Pei's Mom: [subtitles] Like a fox.

Tess (in Anna's body): And what are you doing with this?

[grabs box of french fries]

Anna (in Tess's body): I'm eating.

Tess (in Anna's body): You cannot eat fast food.

Anna (in Tess's body): Why not?

Tess (in Anna's body): Because it will go down your throat and drop instantly to my thighs!

Dottie Robertson: Loved your book, I actually read this one.

Anna (in Tess's body): That makes one of us.

Tess (in Anna's body): She is dead, worse than dead. She will spend the next year in a phoneless, dateless, Amish existence!

Anna (in Tess's body): So, let's do this thingy.

Ryan: You mean our wedding rehearsal?

Anna (in Tess's body): Yeah, whatever.

Ryan: You know what, I'm not really a prying kind of guy, but just for the heck of it, I was wondering what you were doing on the eve of our wedding straddling some guy on the back of a big black Harley?

Anna (in Tess's body): Hello, it was a Ducati!

Anna (in Tess's body): Mom, maybe we should go to the emergency room.

Tess (in Anna's body): Oh no! All that will get us is a 72-hour lockdown in a psych ward and a Thorazine drip. No, we're not going anywhere.

Anna (in Tess's body): So you're in my body, and I'm in your body. Why don't we, like...

Tess (in Anna's body): Yes, yes, I see what you're saying. A jolt! Okay, you go over there, and I go over here. Okay, when I say go. Ready? Go!

[they both bump heads and fall to the ground while Harry walks into the room]

Peg: Aren't you like the maid of horror or something?

Harry: [straws sticking out of his nose] Look I'm a walrus!

Anna: You couldn't last one day in my high school.

Tess: Actually I could, and I would do it without getting a detention.

[first lines]

Tess: Honey, wake up.

Anna: No.

Tess: Anna. Greet the day.

[last lines]

Pei-Pei: Mama! What are you doing? Mama! Grandpa! Harry! No!

[tackles them, grabs cookies]

Pei-Pei: Okay!

Anna: You're ruining my life!

Anna (in Tess's body): Eww! That's disgusting! What kind of caterer ARE you?

Tess: Hello, Dr. Coleman. Yes, Elizabeth. Yes, Elizabeth, I'll be at the appointment tomorrow. Ok, good. And Elizabeth, remember, you are a smart, strong, beautiful, independent woman and you don't need a man to complete you.

Butcher Woman: Thank you.

Tess: Goodbye.

Ryan: [hearing Anna scream because her door is gone] She saw it.

Grandpa: [gets up quick] I'm gonna check those Lakers.

Ryan: I'm with you...

[Ryan has just let Anna go to the Home Of Blues]

Peg: Mr. Dude, you rock!

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